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Discussions : Off your chest... : consquenses of a BAD experience....
Whataheart wrote:
This is a long post but I suppose I just need to get it off my chest! I had a hostess who booked in Nov for Jan. I personally delivered her party pack in December. I called to confirm in Jan when she decided she should tell me I didn't give her any invites (ok so my mistake) so we rebooked for two weeks later. I then drove 3 mins to her place again (on my birthday) to drop the invites off in person but noone was home so I left them in the letterbox and called to confirm she got them a week later and she said yes and she had about 7 people coming.
The day before her party I called to see how it was all going and she told me she needed to postpone again as she had been asked to go in the next night for a parent teacher night at the school. I said I was still happy to come if she trusted one of her friends to host in her absence as it would save putting all of her friends out. The lady she had booked from was her best friend and had been so for over 20 years and even babysat her kids but she said she wasn't really comfortable with that so I let her rebook 2 weeks later.
Before the converstaion was finished I asked her if she was upset with anything I may have done/not done (thinking maybe I hadn't "party planned" her propperly) and she fully blasted me saying I didn't believe her about the parent teacher nite etc etc. I was only concerned for her guests and that maybe I had done something wrong. I burst into tears. I was so upset that I had offended her that I even rang the friend who she'd booked for (who'd had 13 guests and 1500 in sales) in tears apologising for possibly offending her long term friend. She asked if I wanted her to do anything and I said I wan't sure. She decided to ring her friend to see if she was ok This just made matters worse.
The host ended up calling me back and calling me unproffesional and that she had decided to cancele her booking altogether cause she didn't want someone like me in her house. Needless to say I felt horrible, not to mention I was out of pocket having already given host rewards to the original party host (although she was lovely and offered to pay for them but as she had worked so hard I said no don't do that.)
The whole thing stressed me out so much I thought stuff it so I called the host back and said something like since you don't want to have your party can you at least let me come collect the pack I gave you and the left over invites. She said NO but that she would post it....
Well sure enough a couple of days later the pack arrives .... BUT.......... and this made me soooo ANGRY..... when I got it ....Low and Behold ALL THE INVITES were in there... she hadn't even given them out!!!
I learn't that day that some people will say and do anything to get out of a party and that some people also just don't care who gets hurt in the process as long as they don't have to admit their own faults. The sad part is that all that happened back in January and I haven't done a party since. My business has gone from around 3000 a month to zip and part of me is just terrified of getting it all going again! I would prefer not to do it at all than cop all that again!
scentedcandlelady replied:
Oh dear you poor thing...
I had a similar experience but unfortunately or fortunately kept quiet about. I found the best thing to do was get out my list of contacts and start my hostess coaching again and ended up with three bookings. I spoke to my husband who is a cabinet maker and who has a tiered level for terrible customers with his secretary and decided if I had another one like that they went on my red page. The red page being I will not do a party for them, I will not ring them and if they are at a party I do it so they get no freebies without being terribly noticeable. When I do games I always do the highest point scorer and the lowest if it is them I quickly work out the average and give it to the person who does the average. Changes the rules a bit but I know in my self that I feel better.
Call the best friend or have a coffee with her. Explain that you you feel bad but hope that it doesn't stop her from having parties with her again and offer her something you know she likes or even a $20.00 gift voucher for the next time she has a party. As I am writing this I was thinking I would even take a bunch of flowers to her. So that your pathways will always be bright.
And for the hostess who should be on the RED page . Just drop her a letter. Saying thank you for trying to host a party and that you realize that she wasn't really able to do it and that if she hosts a party and has it on her specified date that you will give her a $25.00 gift voucher if held within in 2 months. You never know.. Mind you there would be a lot more I would say, but if you keep your professional party head and keep doing your usual bookings you will realize she is not nice and you will probably never hear from her again.. I will PM a little letter for you for the RED lady...
I hope this has helped and I haven't waffled..
Get out your contact list and start up a Red Page and don't let this RED lady get you down....
And start phoning and get your business up and running again....
take care and all the best.
marina replied:
HI Whataheart,
I do sympathise with you, but there are times when you just have to let it go. We need to be professional at all times and I never would have called the best friend. This was between you and the hostess and if she was playing games with you, then there is nothing you can do.
Remember partyplan is never perfect and it is these sorts of people that can make you or break you.
You need to be strong and do not cry over people like this. It is not worth it. You need to be mentally strong in this business.
Quote "My business has gone from around 3000 a month to zip and part of me is just terrified of getting it all going again! I would prefer not to do it at all than cop all that again!"Unquote
If you think like this you will never succeed in party plan. I am sorry for being harsh but you need to change your mindset. Do not let people control you. Believe in yourself and take the good with the bad. Love your product and love what you do with a passion. Have excitement and energy.
Only you can make yourself be a success.
I will be honest with you. It is not a perfect ride. You will get hurt again somewhere down the track and you need to shrug it off. You will get rejection, you will have a hostess who cancels at the last minute. It will happen again.! But soldier on. Have back up shows, make sure you have over 15 bookings in your diary at any one time. Book, Book Book.
I ALWAYS SAY IF IT WAS EASY EVERYONE WOULD BE DOING IT.
Please take care. I love reading motivational books and hanging around positive inspiring people.
This will all change your mindset,.
take care
marina
Snazza replied:
Hi Whataheart,
Im really sorry to hear of your unfortunate experience. But try not to let it ruin your business. It takes all types in this world and you will no doubt encounter the good and bad along the way.
I havent acutally had the same experience as you although i feel i can liken it to a lady that replied to an advert i had in the local paper looking for new recruits. She was my first caller and very keen after speaking with me to join on the dotted line. I hand delivered a pack to her and waited. She called me a few days later to ask a couple of questions which i answered and she said cool well i definately want to join, i will pop the forms into you on wednesday. Well that didnt happen and i thought i would let it go a little longer as i didnt want to annoy her. I called about a week later and she apologised saying she had run out of money but would definately drop it in the post tomorrow, she didnt. Each time i spoke to her she was so keen and was definate about wanting to join but well to this day i never got those papers back. I just wish people could take the time to be honest. I always try to treat people as i would like to be treated. Since then i have signed 4 others but of course i still cant help but wonder what happened for her not to follow through. She even had her home number changed but gave me her new one so if she wasnt wanting me to contact her she would have had the perfect opportunity. Anyway although the curiosity factor is there as to why....i have moved on and wont let her hold me back.
You need to do the same. Pick yourself up and dust yourself off and soldier on. You were making great sales by the sounds of it so dont let one person ruin it for you. You have to trust in yourself and dont be too hard on yourself. Just put it down to experience.
Good luck and i really hope you find your way back.
Sincere best wishes
Snazza
kathymollie replied:
Hi what a heart....
Very sad to read your story and your unfortunate experience...unfortunately in life we do and will always come across people that treat us badly and for what ever reason we may never know...but that is their "stuff"....you cannot take it on board....also we never know what is going on in peoples lives at that particular moment...that is not to say that we allow them to walk all over us....
I felt for you that she upset you so much...but you will be stronger for the experience...many people in the community do not take party plan seriously they think for us it is a hobby..BUT they are incorrect for us (or me) at least it is a full time career...and we must some how change that mentality that people have...
I recently had a bad experience at work(l'm a nurse)...where the weaker component in the unit tried to turn all things around and he tried to blame others for his incompetence...yes and at the time it was upsetting to me..but with a little thought and l put it into perspective..and watched his lies unravellel...l thought 'what a d...h...d'....and l refused to give him the power to upset us who work hard..and are very competent at our job....
People will always blame others for their inadequacies....that is life and very unfortunate..but we can gain strength from the experience..
Now you MUST regain your confidence...go out there and get your diary filled with bookings..and you will be successful..DO NOT let this one bad experience bring you down..
Life is too short.....You are the winner...Walk proud and believe in yourself and your product..
I wish you all the best of luck..
Kind regards...Kathy
Whataheart replied:
I really do need to just get back into it don't I !!!
I suppose all it will take is one GOOD party to get my confidence back.
I better get on the phone and find a booking!!
Thanks Everyone.
thelilacangel replied:
Hi Whataheart
That's it dust yourself off and get back up
I let a few bad eggs make me believe party plan wasnt for me and left for about 6 months and then I decided that party plan was who I am and so returned the night before my relaunch party I miscarried and so wasnt feeling up it having anyone at my home but decided something good had to come out of something so awful so I had my party and took the bookings as their came as I still wasnt sure what I do would do if and when I came across another bad egg which I did and thats when I decided it was their lost not mine and party plan is a roller coaster you take the highs with the lows and at the end of the ride the highs far out weigh the lows and as the old saying goes "What doesnt kill us only makes us stronger"
So dont let others beat you down as they are the losers at the end of it all